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OPINION

OKIE IN EXILE — Be on the lookout

Bobby Neal Winters
Bobby Winters

A little over a week ago as I write this, I lost my wedding ring. I was sitting in my office having a Teams meeting with two colleagues; I felt my ring finger like I do out of habit; and it was gone.

I may have exclaimed something at that point, but I will leave it to either of my two colleagues to say what. Those who know me best might make a quick guess.

I’ve gotten a lot of advice about how to look for it. I’ve alerted the custodian and campus police to be on the lookout for it in Lost and Found. I’ve checked my pockets, retraced my steps, dumped out my various pencil holders.

Nothing.

If you find a rose gold, nugget shaped ring somewhere around the circle of Pittsburg I frequent, please let me know.

This is not a ring of great material worth. I think it cost several hundred dollars 30 years ago in that jewelry store on Main Street in Stillwater, Oklahoma where we got it. There is a great deal of sentimental value that goes along with it, of course, but that’s not the reason I am missing it.

I miss it because I feel naked without it. When I say that, I am not speaking figuratively. I mean that I feel like I’ve stepped out of the shower to discover I am at the corner of 4th and Broadway.

I tried to explain this to one of my daughters and she said, “Oh yeah, Dad, you’re such a chick magnet.”

Even though she’s brilliant, had great ACT scores, and is highly educated, she doesn’t quite get it.

Such was my discomfort, that within 12 hours of losing my ring, I’d gotten on Amazon and bought a new one.

While doing that, I made a discovery, maybe several. First: you can buy a wedding ring on Amazon.com. Second: They don’t cost that much. Third: You can order one on Friday evening and have it on your finger before that time on Monday. Fourth: You can do that for about $20.

So as I type this, I do so with a $20 ring on my finger that is made of tungsten carbide.

It’s not as attractive as the one my wife got me. It doesn’t have the sentimental value. It doesn’t have the monetary value.

But I don’t feel naked anymore.

I squeeze my left pinkie and middle fingers against it, and I think about my wife. I feel it, and I know my wife is about in the world, and that I am not alone.

And my heart is at ease.

Again, if you find a ring of the description above, contact me through Facebook. There’s no reward other than the good it will do your soul, but I will appreciate it.

Bobby Winters, a native of Harden City, Oklahoma, blogs at redneckmath.blogspot.com and okieinexile.blogspot.com. He invites you to “like'' the National Association of Lawn Mowers on Facebook.